Hippo and Chris Exchange Emails During NFL Draft 1st Round

My podcast co-host Chris and I exchanged emails during the first round of the NFL draft. 4000 words later, here it is.

7:09 PM Chris
So we talked about stealing a big idea from Grantland and [Bill] Simmons of publishing a transcript of our email back and forth during the draft. I am starting this thing. First off, we are watching on NFL Network because of our combined love for Rich Eisen. What’s up with their microphones? Is this 1978? Seems like there could be a nicer, smaller version. They are showing Andrew Luck on the phone. There was a ton of hoopla about not showing guys on their phones before the picks. They explained that Luck was the exception. I like this idea. It will make the draft far more entertaining.

Number 1 pick is in – DUH. Andrew Luck to the Colts. We knew this before last season even started. What is really silly? They show the Colts war room and the guys are hugging and celebrating over this pick. What tools. No brainer pick. They did nothing but be terrible all last season. War room should not be able to celebrate that one. Looking to Redskins now…I wonder who it will be…

7:14 Hippo
I am partially watching NFL Network because I think Chris Berman is more washed up than Shaquille O’Neal was two years ago. I like the phone idea as well, we will see if they stick to it. As for the fake excitement, I agree, but this whole thing is a charade. These teams taking 10 minutes to make a pick is crazy, they know long ago who they are taking. Andrew Luck is not a good looking man. And his voice is freakishly deep. Griffin is official, and Richardson is unquestionably next. First 30 minutes are L-A-M-E.

7:21 PM Chris
Maybe not a lame first 30 minutes. The Browns pic is already in before RGIII is even announced. Eisen just said that Nike has a hotpress in the back to put names on the jerseys right there. That is AWESOME. Luck is a doofus. That’s for sure. RGIII is going to be good. I hope he makes it. He is so personable and seemingly humble. I like that in a dude. It would be fun to watch. I’d like the see the Redskins do something in the NFC East. It has been too too long. The first commercial. I also believe it is supposed to be the ONLY commercial. That’s pretty great. It is what makes Olympic hockey so fun. No commercial breaks during periods.

John Hamm doing some narrating for some of these segments. Pretty sweet. Nice to see he’s just a “regular” dude. I like what Minnesota did to Cleveland here making them trade THREE picks to move up only one spot to get a player there was no way Minnesota would draft. Pretty awesome. They and St. Louis have already had a pretty good return on their picks. Trent Richardson to Cleveland. Just last year Peyton Hillis was on the cover of Madden. Seems like a curse to me. RIchardson is going to be a beast. Going to look good in the Browns uniform…

Crazy. Before Richardson is even announced, we already have the next pick in. This is moving fast. Let’s keep it up.

7:26 Hippo
The hot press idea is brilliant. I have high hopes that RG3 is going to be good in the NFL. This backup is insane. TV ruins it somewhat if this is how it’s going to work. I want to see the picks and not all this other stuff. It’s ruining it I feel like. Hamm is such a badass. Total man crush on that guy. I also couldn’t believe how much Cleveland gave up, but that shows you how badly they wanted Trent, and he’s probably worth it.

Phillip Humber’s quest for two straight perfect games ended in the 1st inning, in case you were wondering. As awesome as I think Trent could be, those Browns fans are a little too excited for a draft pick. Vikings better be taking Kalil.

7:49 Chris
We just had our first snafu here [with email]. Vikings of course took Kalil and Jax took Blackmon. Then STL pulls another great move. They trade their pick for Dallas’s first and second rounders. This is exactly what STL needs. They need so many pieces and have a great shot to get them.

The Cowboys take Claiborne. Good pick. What’s the deal with all the draft parties at these stadiums? Is there a chance in hell you would ever attend one of these things? How crazy is it that picks 2-7 were all out of the original order? Also, I guess I was wrong about the no commercials. Maybe I heard that from ESPN. Tampa just took Mark Barron who I do not know…Miami on the clock

7:52 Hippo
Blackmon is such a boom or bust guy for me. I don’t have a ton of faith that he is a franchise guy. Did you see that stat a while back about schools? USC and Notre Dame were #1 and #2, and they were more than 60 picks ahead of #3 Ohio St. You were wrong about commercials, and the trades have been ridiculous.

I don’t understand why the Cowboys traded up so far with at least two other 1st round CBs. I am not surprised Barron went that high, he is going to be good. Very good. This is moving so fast it’s hard to digest it all. So different than years past. I still think Tannehill is a huge mistake.

7:58 PM Chris
Tannehill might just be a huge bust. NUMBER 8!!! I didn’t know his name 30 days ago. Crazy. Looks like J-Lo and Serena are going to have a rough time down there in Miami. QB controversy there? I can’t believe there is such a logjam here. 2 picks piled up at all times. I think Blackmon is going to be good. Just a shame he went to such a crappy team. Maybe he will be the superstar of the LA Jaguars.

Carolina takes the BC LB Luke Kuechly. My understanding is that he is the best LB on the board. That’s a good pick for them. They need to get better and it starts with defense for them. Nice to see that he was at home. 26 guys in house and #9 is at home. I think it is a lot more fun to see the reaction at home anyway.

How bout Trent RIchardson and those kids? They were OLD. Wow…Lots of commercials….disappointing. So we are already about 1/3 of the way through in under an hour. That’s promising. I won’t have to be up all night. Buffalo’s pick is in and KC is on the clock but we don’t know the results yet…

8:04 Hippo
QB Controversy? With who? Matt Moore? Who is he competing with? Kuechly is supposed to be Urlacher 2.0. Stupid speed and coverage. People are really high on him. I was intentionally avoiding talking about Richardson’s kids. Didn’t want to go there. Did you see on Twitter earlier people talking about Matt Kalil’s mom? I am not sure which subject is touchier. I am worried the Bears won’t get a DB at 19. Kirkpatrick is the only first rounder left I think. How great is Lombardi? I am totally picturing myself in about 15 years.

8:10 Chris
I was hoping that Gillmore would slip to the Bears. Oh well, he went to Buffalo. He didn’t look very happy to be going to the coldest, whitest NFL city. Sorry Stephon. Lombardi is great. I could see that. The man looks like he loves his pasta, but so so knowledgable. So Dontari Poe to KC. Ok. They should have an alright D-Line if he pans out. Speaking of Poe – did a famous braid lady come to do all these dudes’ hair? They are all sporting some weird looking hair. Eagles traded up. So. Many. Trades. I really like this break neck pace. Much better than slowwww. We’ve had our first Conference USA guy go now. Time for some Big Ten???

8:14 Hippo
I didn’t know Poe before a month ago. We need to see another skill player go. Has there been one since Tannehill? My dad was badly hoping Floyd would slip to the Bears. I think St. Louis is going to grab him at #14 though. Big Ten doesn’t have any superstars. Might be Merrcilus (sp?) to the Bears at 19 before it happens. Pace is great.

8:21 Chris
Yeah, I think we are stuck waiting until probably Merrcilus before a Big Ten guy goes. How terrible does every mock look right now? Ha. FLOYD to AZ. Wow. Floyd and Fitzgerald. That’s impressive. Too bad they don’t have a damn QB. If they can get someone to throw to him, Floyd might excel. He won’t be double covered, ever. I was thinking he’d go to StL too.

It is starting to look like the Bears will be getting Merrcilus (we are probably butchering his name). I don’t know if there will be a better pick, but I am not sure I like it. I guess we can talk about that when we get there. StL is finally going to use the first of the many (5, 6, 7?) picks that they turned #2 into. Hey, they were on the clock for 10 seconds and the pick is in…over to you.

8:28 Hippo
I had heard Arizona was interested in a WR. They have so many holes I am not sure if it was the best way to go. Maybe not a good O-lineman to take there. If he can keep his nose clean he should be good. He’s big and strong. Bears are definitely getting a lineman at this point I think. That Chandler guy is a hot name. I don’t think I am big on Whitney either. Another commercial. So lame that the pick is in and we constantly have to wait several minutes more. And there is our first “what??” pick of the night. I don’t know this guy. At all. Brockers?

8:35 Chris I didn’t know Brockers either. I guess StL didn’t need that early pick if they went off the board like that. Yeah, the commercials are a little annoying especially when there is so much backed up. Seattle is up. No idea who. Bruce Irvin. Another never heard of guy. Mayock seems to like him.

Jets are up. We are going to be halfway through in just over 90 minutes. This has to be a record. Ok – I think the commercials are starting to get excessive. I don’t know if it is because I expected none or what, but I feel like we are getting almost no analysis. They have 10 guys there. Let me hear what they have to say. I do like that we have been surprised at a lot of picks. That no cell phone policy is paying off.

8:49 Hippo
Another delay‚Ķso let’s get caught up. Apparently I was wrong about Brockers. Kiper had him going 15th, so he only went one pick early. Irvin is definitely the first “what?” guy. Kiper didn’t even have him in the first round. Sounds like lots of character issues. Coples seems like somewhat of a steal at 16, good for the Jets. I was thinking the same thing about the cell phone policy. It has made this so much more exciting. Analysis doesn’t seem what it usually is. A lot more predictions about next picks rather than analysis.

Kirkpatrick went to the Bengals. I was really hoping he would fall to the Bears. Two picks away. I won’t be shocked if they grab an OL. So many have fallen. Could get lots of value there. But DL is probably the right guess.

8:54 Chris
I looked over at ESPN.com where they are grading the picks. Everyone got an A or a B except Miami for Tannehill (C) and Irvin (D+). I was hoping that he would fall to the Bears too. I’m kinda thinking Upshaw or Hightower now for the Bears. The LBs are old and it could be rough if one of them goes down. It looks like the Bears are in a good place. They have so many options. I think I am kind of glad that Floyd didn’t fall. I think there would have been a lot of pressure to draft him and now they have a little more freedom. Chargers selection is…Melvin Ingram. Another Gamecock. Wow. The Bears have the world here. Let’s see what they do.

8:56 Hippo
Bears do have the world. My dad just asked me about Ingram, but I don’t think he fits the scheme. I really have no idea where they go here. Like you said, so many options. Look at Ingram’s ridiculous hands. Those things are enormous!

8:59 Chris
Shea McClellin???? Wow…I am speechless. I guess they had a lot of options. I don’t really understand.

9:02 Hippo
Speechless doesn’t begin to describe it. I am not big on the Boise St. guys. Mayock said this guy has moved up a lot as of late. But with all the guys out there, I did not see that coming.

9:04 Chris I definitely didn’t see that coming either. I don’t like this Boise State stuff either. I think there were plenty of SEC guys available. Patriots just traded up. That is a shock. This is a draft full of surprises. Meghen just got home. First words out of her mouth, “This has got to be the most boring thing in the world to watch.” Haha, if she only knew.

9:07 Hippo
Still no Big Ten. I thought Reiff would go by now. Tell Meghen there is probably a book club meeting somewhere right now. Kendall Wright is a small dude. His mom, sister and girlfriend are all taller than him.

9:14 Chris Kendall Wright is small. That lady he hugged (mom?) was a giant compared to him. 2 Baylor guys have been drafted and nobody from the damn Big Ten. How awful. We are three picks in the queue. Geesh. Patriots just took Chandler Jones. Now Syracuse even has a friggin draft pick. How terrible for the Big Ten. Bulls won. They clinched the top overall seed. Joe House and Simmons can suck on their prediction that no one would win 50. Bulls 50-16.

Back to Draft. Cleveland – Brandon Weeden!!!! Colt McCoy has to be crying right now. He was probably stoked with Trent and now devastated. Wow. I really was not expecting this. Goodell with a salute to the U.S. Military? That’s pretty nice. I did not expect that. I kind of like how there is so much of this now. Every game I go to they salute someone. Nice touch for the draft now that it is such a huge event.

U-S-A!

9:19 Hippo
Crazy about Baylor and no Big Ten. And Goodell was bigger than Wright. If he’s not Steve Smith 2.0 that is going to be a problem. I don’t like how these picks back up. The system is definitely broken. Amazing that the Bulls won. I didn’t even remember they were playing. Can’t wait for the playoffs to start. Weeden is a stunner. I don’t at all understand that. He wouldn’t have been there at top of 2nd or did they lose that pick? I thought McCoy was their guy. They traded all those picks too. Bad move. He’s 28?!? Such a crazy one. Salute to troops is always a good thing. BIG TEN!!!!!! Reiff fell a long way. Great pick for Lions.

9:23 Chris
So the Big Ten on the board. Unfortunately he went to the Lions. It was a good pick. I was hoping they’d take another bust WR. Another OL. Run time? Patriots man. They never do this. Hightower is going to be good for NE. You wait and see.

9:28 Hippo
Hightower was going to be a beast anyway. But now I agree, really big time now. I forgot Mariucci was even there. I feel like he’s been super quiet. It seems like it works out best when the guy isn’t there, so it moves along faster.

There really isn’t anyone left who I am that interested in. I want to see where Mercilus (confirmed spelling) goes and also Stanford TE Coby Fleener. Otherwise I want to see if there are any other surprises. I would love to see someone reach for the next QB, who I would assume is Arizona St. Brandon Osweiler1.

9:35 Chris
There Mercilus goes. Holy crap – they are going nuts at his house. I guess they needed to replace Mario Williams. It is a pretty good pick IMO. He dropped a little bit. I am only kind of sort of interested in the Stanford QB. Also want to see what GB is going to do. I have been really interested in the way these teams are moving around. This HAS to be a record for 1st round trades. If StL had taken a better pick at 14, I would feel a lot better about them. I like a lot of this.

Still kind of shocked about Cleveland. Could be interesting there. They went from being excited about Colt McCoy and Peyton Hillis just 16 months or so ago to this. Wow, just wow. I really don’t know if Weeden is going to give them much more than Colt. Time will tell. He will have that beast in the backfield behind him.

So – the Bears and that white DE. Hmm…I hope Phil Emery has some good things to say tomorrow. Mariucci has been very quiet. He is so entertaining when he wants to be. I don’t know why he is quiet. Bengals take Zeitler from Wisc as the next pick. Run on Big Ten guys at the end of the round. Like it. The Cheeseheads are on the clock.

9:39 Hippo
That was insane. That girl who jumped on the chair almost gave away the farm too. He did drop a bit too. I assume you meant Stanford TE, because their QB went 1st overall :). The trades have been insane, seems like a new trend because I feel like this happened last year. Browns fans can’t catch a break, that team just keeps blowing it up.

ESPN Stats and Info tweeted that Reiff going that late tied the record for lowest a Big 10 player has gone since 1968. Now there is a run. I doubt there is one more left in the 1st round though unless someone reaches for the Wisconsin C Peter Konz. Packers are going to grab best player out there. Not sure who that is but I bet Mayock loves it. Knicks’ B-Team beat Bobcats by 20. Officially worst winning percentage ever.

9:46 Chris
Packers get Perry from USC. Eh. Is he really best available? If he is really good, he and Clay Matthews might be scary. Another NFC North pick – Vikings trade up. 4 picks left and 6 guys still in the Green Room. Why the hell do they have so many guys there? It’s bad enough when you think you are going top ten and have to wait til the 20s. It must really suck to not even get picked at all in the first round. Do you come back for Friday? Are there guys invited for Friday and not Thursday? Would be a big letdown. And a minimum of 2 guys will have that happen.

To go along with Kalil, Vikes take…Harrison Smith. I don’t know this guy. He might be a good pickup though. Minnesota has been hurting in the defensive backfield.

9:48 Hippo
He was not best available. McShay had him going 20th in the 2nd round. Another boom or bust type of guy. I didn’t know there were 6 guys left. I saw Upshaw and his angry mom. Who are the other 5 guys? You have to come back tomorrow. You are already there. I don’t know Smith either, but Notre Dame was so bad I never watched them play at all. Looks like we are up to 1 commercial break per pick now. Also, they are talking about how fast this is, but it’s slotted on the guide to go until 10:30. It’s not like it’s going to be one that fast. Three picks left, this is going until 10:10 I bet.

9:52 Chris
It’s time for B-Bo’s Niners. Can’t possibly be as weird as Colin Kaepernick from last year can it? AJ Jenkins from ILL. Wow. 2 ILL guys in first round. Mayock just said he was rated as 8th WR. I don’t know what to make of it. We’ll have to see what B-Bo thinks. You are right about the commercial breaks. They were on the air for about 50 seconds with that pick and a huge chunk of that was another commercial for a Verizon app. The NFL must be hurting for cash. I wonder if ESPN really did go commercial free after Luck. Who’s excited for the Avengers?

9:57 Hippo
Absolutely shocked. McShay had him going 63rd overall. Big Ten with a big run. Illinois’ Football Twitter account just said thats the first time two first rounders for Illinois since 1996 (that was Simeon Rice and Kevin Hardy I believe). Also they said 5 first rounders for Illinois in last 5 years, the most in the Big Ten. I wonder if ESPN did too. I haven’t switched over once yet. NFL isn’t hurting for cash, just greedy.

I am excited for Avengers. We are doing a Summer movie pod in the next couple of weeks, I didn’t tell you that yet. More Jon Hamm too. You still never told me who is left in the Green room. Do you remember now? Tampa goes with Boise St. RB Doug Martin. If you are scoring at home, that’s more picks each for Baylor and Boise St. than Michigan, Penn St. and Ohio St. combined.

10:02 Chris
I don’t know who is in the green room. Eisen mentioned the stat that I said. With 4 picks to go he said 20 of the 26 guys here have been picked. That left 6. So Upshaw is there and it doesn’t look like he is getting picked. I am surprised about ILL. We’ll see. This thing is going to finish in under 3 hours. That is good. I am getting pretty wiped and my Macbook battery is going to die soon. Nothing for Michigan, Ohio State or Penn State. Crazy. They will all end up with more draft picks overall than Boise or Baylor though. Who we got for the Super Bowl champs. I will let it fall to you good friend…

10:05 Hippo
They showed the list. Lots of big names still there. Somebody is going to get someone good in the first 30 minutes tomorrow. Not under three hours from when they went on the air. Still blazing speed. B-Bo tweeted he is happy with the pick and loves the depth at WR now. The Giants close it out with Virginia Tech RB David Wilson. Seems like a reach, buy Mayock loves it. Any final thoughts?

10:09 Chris
I thought it was a good draft. It was entertaining, exciting. I liked it. This was fun. We might have to try it with some other events. Glad to hear B-Bo is happy. Maybe this dude won’t muff any huge important punts… Sad to see Devon Still (PSU) was one of the guys in the green room at the end of the night. I guess that’s why they have 2 night hotel reservations. That’s it for me. Good night!

  1. I meant Brock []