Diary: My First Experience With The Challenge

I have never watched a second of The Challenge, but it’s one of Chris’ favorite shows and he has brought it up on the podcast before, so I thought I would document my experience how it happens.

00:01 – No one looks like how I pictured them. Not CT or TJ Lavin. I expected CT to look less “pretty”, like scarier or something I guess. The shock and amazement on their faces when they find out it’s rivals seems weird. The show is called “Rivals 2”, so they clear have done this before, why the shock? And why is TJ Lavin the host of this? He is not at all what you expect the host of a show to look like. And he looks super stoned in the opening scene.

0:03 – So far we have people named Wes, CT, Diem, Aneesa, Trey, and Anastasia. Are the initial requirements that you have to have an usual name. Zach is as normal as we have so far. Where are the Dave, Mark, Mike and Johns?

0:05 – Ty and Leroy are paired together. I was started to wonder where the diversity in this show was. Nice to see them pair them together like it’s Noah’s ark.

0:06 – We have now added a Ty, Leroy, Naomi, Cooke, Preston, Knight, Jemmye, Camilla, Tyrie, Dunbar before finally getting Sarah. Don’t worry though, she is paired with Trishelle.

0:07 – Jordan, Marlon, Nany, Jonna and Jasmine are here now. And thankfully the last two guys are Frank and Johnny. I don’t know if I couldn’t have handled what else could have possibly been left.

0:08– I have to be honest I really can’t believe how many people there are. How many episodes is this season?

0:11 – So basically the cast of The Challenge is the most bro-ish guys and girls from The Real World? Were all of these people on The Real World or are some of them just random?

0:12 – So the cast is 30 people to start. That is way more than I expected. So wonder this show gets so out of control.

0:13 – So far CT is laying the groundwork to live up to all the hype. He is already fighting a guy in the pool.

0:17 – I wonder why none of my friends are like these people, but then one of the guys says “I think I could take him”, and I figure out why. Then I see a guy naked on a toilet, passed out, mid poop and I feel a bit for humanity.

0:19 – Diem goes from completely unlikable because of her romantic association to CT, to the sentimental favorite with her cancer story.

0:20 – There seems to be a high number of wrist wear on this show, both guys and girls. CT looks like he has about 20 paper wrist bands on right now. I missed the memo that it was cool to leave those on forever.

I just looked and noticed that this show is 90 minutes long. I am immediately regretting the decision to watch.

0:21 – I badly want to know Preston’s history, but not bad enough to Google him. He clearly is the total outlier in this whole group.

0:22 – The first challenge looks awesome on paper. One person is suspended via a harness over a lake. the other person has to run and jump into their arms and not fall. The catch is that you then have to hold onto the other person for 15 seconds.

0:28 – The girls go first and every single one of them makes into the other persons’ arms the first time, and they all hang on for 15 seconds. I wonder if MTV immediately thought, “crap this was too easy”.

0:29 – they move it back a foot and 5 girls instantly miss. Sidenote: there are 30 people, so there must be 15 teams, which means an uneven number of guys and girls teams. I quickly find out there are 8 girls teams. I am really sad they didn’t show a replay, or some sort of slow motion to see how people fell or how close they came.

0:31 – Another girls team is eliminated. We get to see the people who made it again, but not the people that fell. They are all wearing GoPro cameras, why are we not seeing any of that footage? Apparently this is the last round and it’s just who can hang out the longest if you make it, but we get a mid-jump commercial, of course.

0:35 – One girl doesn’t make the jump and we finally see some useless GoPro footage. The other team has to hang out for the 15 seconds to win…and they do.

0:36 – Tyrie says he can’t trust Dunbar. I would imagine it’s hard to trust anyone named Dunbar.

0:37 – Unsurprisingly all the guys make it the first time. CT provides some nice commentary on how he is basically trying to inflict pain on this partner. Seems like a winning strategy.

0:38 – One male team fails to make the second jump. And of course it’s Dunbar. another mid-jump commercial.

0:43 – We return to see Leroy and Ty getting eliminated. Then only one team survives the 4th round. Wes takes a shot at CT. These guys will come to blows before it’s over, for sure.

0:44 – The winners Zach and Trey are completely differently sized. Zach is huge and Trey is tiny, and apparently there was actually debate about who should jump. When you watch the replay of who won it’s 100% clear that if Zach isn’t catching Trey falls since he uses his upper body strength to pull them up. Seems like basic physics at work, and very obvious…nevermind.

0:45 – Did Zach play Kal Drogo on Game of Thrones?

0:51 – Apparently there is going to be a vote to see who gets put in the elimination match. CT is working the crowd to get Johnny voted off apparently.

0:52 – I see now that this is where all the drama starts. I am starting to lose interest…

0:53 – FYI, Diem looks 1000x better without the wig. She should leave it off for the remainder.

0:54 – Wait, the voting is done one by one out loud?!?!? You might as well just show them having intercourse with each other’s mothers.

0:55 – Oh man, what a twist, only the girls are going to vote. Poop just went into the hurricane!

0:57 – Apparently this is a permanent twist. Judging by their reactions you would think they were just told no more alcohol or performance enhancing drugs would be served.

0:58 – I see a lot of boxed wine. At least they shelled out serious dough for quality beverages.

0:59 – Johnny just called CT “Chris”. I can’t believe he has a real name. I thought CT was his given name.

1:02 – I wondered who the young people were that were keeping the cigarette industry afloat, it’s everyone on this show apparently.

1:05 – Naomi calls home and finds out here dad is sick. They are definitely giving you people to root for. Seems like a good move when the main character is basically CT, a horrible, horrible person.

1:07 – Naomi is heading home to be with her family. Cooke, her partner seems genuinely sad for her, but it’s weird.

1:08 – Maybe CT is just skewing things, but Wes seems super likable and I am going to feel sad for him if CT costs him this game.

1:14 – Chris warned me that the final challenge was very much like the Oklahoma drill in football. Looks cool.

1:22 – It was a little bit anti-climatic though. Robb and Derek seem likable though.

1:26 – It’s party time now. I can’t really figure out the timeline for things. Was that final challenge the only thing they did that whole day?